How many times have you thought to yourself, “I need to be more patient”? Have you been in a situation when you had to practice patience? I know I accidentally asked God to give me more patience, and do you know what He did? Exactly what I asked! He allowed me to be in multiple situations where I had to practice that very skill. Let me share a few of my experiences with you and what I have learned in the waiting.
I have been attending church since I was born. My mother was raised in the church, as was her mother, and so on. Going to church all of my life didn’t equate to fully understanding what it meant to have a strong relationship with God. When I was growing up, I often wondered why I didn’t “hear from God” the way other people did or why I didn’t “feel God” in the same way I heard people describe. As I prayed for my miraculous moment, I found myself wanting…and waiting. I wanted what those people had. I wanted to experience God for myself, but I didn’t hear His voice the way I expected or desired. So I waited…and I waited. Now I am grateful for the authenticity of that relationship. I’ve learned when we seek Him, God always shows up in the waiting (Lamentations 3:25).
Waiting comes in lots of forms. About 10 years ago I was diagnosed with a few health problems, and as I get older, the symptoms affect me differently. As a result, I find myself in the doctor’s office a bit more these days – waiting. Since my husband is retired Air Force, we typically utilize our military clinic and hospitals, but when they are full, they refer me to a specialty doctor or clinic that is in network so I can be seen in a timely manner. I frequently find myself at different medical facilities that I have not visited, meeting doctors and nurses I have never seen before. Often, I have to wait to be seen. God took my prayer request for patience seriously!
To emphasize my point, let me highlight some of my health issues. As a college athlete, I participated in volleyball and cheerleading. During my freshman year, while playing in a volleyball game, I tore my left ACL (anterior cruciate ligament) and had knee reconstruction surgery. I was unable to participate in anything physical for the next year. I spent six months of that year hobbling around campus in a boot, longing to run and be free like the rest of my friends. More waiting. Eventually, I played and cheered again during my junior and senior years of college. I was so thankful for the opportunity to be part of the team again. In the waiting, I’ve learned to appreciate opportunities we often take for granted (James 1:17).
Fast forward about 13 years later. I had the bright idea to join a co-ed volleyball league in my mid-thirties. I was having the time of my life until I jumped up to spike a ball and re-injured that same knee! So, off to the hospital we went, where I learned I had once again torn the same ACL and needed another surgery. Can you imagine having four little kiddos and needing to have knee surgery AGAIN? Well, that’s exactly what happened.
I had my second knee surgery and about a 6-month recuperation time. This time the recovery was much more difficult, and I itched to get moving because I had things to do, places to go, and kids to take care of! My doctor warned me that not allowing sufficient healing time would hinder my progress and possibly damage my knee further, so I heeded his instructions and went faithfully to physical therapy. I couldn’t run around with my kids or get up and down the steps in our home easily. Everything took so much time to do, and my patience ran thin. Paper thin. I grew tired of waiting. In the waiting, I’ve learned I am never alone. God never fails, even when I do (Psalm 33:20).
Let’s talk more present day. A couple of months ago, I started struggling with walking. My knee – yep, the same one – would give out on me and buckle sometimes. So I started wearing my brace again. I would take the occasional Tylenol, and when it got really bad, I would sit down and stay off of it. Sitting down doesn’t actually fit my lifestyle, so I called the Air Force clinic to make an appointment. They couldn’t fit me in for almost a month, so they referred me to another medical facility.
When I arrived at the new clinic, I was surprised by how many people were in the waiting room. The waiting room had a TV, puzzle games for kids in the middle of the floor, and a coffee bar. It was a busy place! It was noisy, there was a lot of movement, people were coughing – honestly, I just wanted to see the doctor. I kept waiting and checking the time. About 15 minutes past my appointment time, I was called back. FINALLY! It felt like a very long 15 minutes. I had X-rays done, and then they suggested I get an MRI. So I was referred to another imaging site. Great, more waiting.
Three days later, I went to get an MRI at a different medical center. This time I decided to take a book with me in case I had to wait. The waiting room was nice and quiet. There were two people in the room with me; one was flipping through a magazine, and the other was scrolling on her phone. They promptly called me back, so I didn’t even open my book. There was no wait. I loved it. I sat in the MRI machine for approximately a half hour while it clicked and banged and made all kinds of grinding noises. The noise was such a distraction. In the waiting, I’ve learned we sometimes have to silence the noise being mindful of how the Lord may be using people, situations, or circumstances to gain our attention (Psalm 62:5-6).
The final waiting room was for the orthopedic surgeon. I was the only one in this waiting room, and I forgot to bring my book. The room had nothing in it – no magazines, no books, no television. Just me alone with my thoughts. So, I started to consider all the different things that the doctor might say. I imagined him saying, “Yes, you definitely need a knee replacement.” I could also hear him say, “It’s not as bad as we thought. You just need to start some physical therapy to strengthen it.” As much as my mind wandered, I knew I would not feel peace until I spoke to the doctor and he shared what I needed to know. So, once again, I waited.
When I was called back, the doctor didn’t waste any time telling me I had traumatic osteoarthritis in my knee from the prior injuries and surgeries. I also had multiple bone spurs and ligament damage. He told me that I was too young for a knee replacement and that my knee was still extremely strong. He shared a recommended course of action. We determined that I would get PRP injections (my own blood platelets injected into my knee) approximately every 4-8 months, contingent on how it worked for me, and that we would re-evaluate accordingly.
I finally had answers. I had a plan! I knew what was going to happen next. What a relief! I had refused to give up searching for an answer to my knee issue. I kept pressing until I got an answer. In the waiting, I’ve learned how critical it is to press on through the struggle and not let my mind create worst-case scenarios (James 1:2-4).
In our everyday lives, sometimes we don’t press when we are struggling; we don’t turn to God for the answer. If we pursued God like we pursue other things in life, chances are we would hear from Him a lot faster. However, too often, we don’t – especially in the waiting.
As you can see there is so much to learn in the waiting. I’ve found God doesn’t always answer our questions or solve our problems immediately. However, He is ALWAYS right on time. The peace I experienced after waiting for an answer from the doctor after several other appointments was amazing for my mental health. I calmed right down, knowing there was a plan in place. Likewise, if we follow God’s plan, we know that He will always answer us. He may not respond when we want Him to answer, but His timing will always be perfect. He’s an “on-time” God. During those times when we are asked to wait on His timing, we should seek Him and read His Word. We know from our past life experiences that He will show up. He doesn’t know how to fail. There are always lessons to be learned in the waiting, and I have learned one of the most important lessons of them all.
God is in the waiting.
“But as for me, I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation;
my God will hear me” (Micah 7:7.)
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